Four Season Queens

Sorry for the delay on this post, folks. We've already had a new Drag Superstar for weeks and I've been slacking! I know you're thinking "Get your prioRUties in order Poptagonist!" And you are right to do so. So let's take a look at the cast of RuPaul's Drag Race Season 4!

From left: The Princess, Willam, Kenya Michaels, Milan, Chad Michaels, Dida Ritz, Jiggly Caliente, Lashawn Beyond, Phi Phi O'Hara, Latrice Royale, Sharon Needles, Alisa Summers, Madame LaQueer

Alisa Summers

As much as it is always hard for me to say goodbye to any drag queen, I must say that Alisa was the contestant that really didn't do anything for me. She was pretty, and seemed well put together, but there wasn't anything to really make me want to see more from her. One could argue that Jiggly Caliente should have been the one to sashay away after their Lip Synch for Your Life, but at least Jiggly was a hot mess, which every comptetition needs more than a fishy dead weight with a breast plate, which is what Alisa seemed like.

Lashawn Beyond

Aside from having a great name that gayly bounces off the tongue, Lashawn seemed to have a fashion sense that was very eccentric, playful and fun. Unfortunately, her personality did not match her fashion sense, she was quiet and a little boring (the ultimate no-no for a drag queen). While she seemed timid she did give the notoriously awesome line "I'm not here to make best friends, bitch! This isn't RuPaul's Best Friends Race!"... But she said it to Jiggly... Who is kind of a bitch... And she is right, it's not RuPaul's Best Friends Race. Lashawn was all high-highs and low-lows, her looks were over the top and fun, but she was either far too demure and passive.... or screaming at Jiggly in "Untucked"... She also said she didn't know what "Postapocalitic" (her pronunciation of post apocalyptic) means... Not the most bubbly gumball in the machine.

The Princess

The Princess was another queen whose personality didn't quite match her look. She kept saying that she was "punk" but also a "very Zen person", which I guess means boring TV personality with fun looks. She seemed more down to earth and genuinely sweet and kind than many of the contestants. But, sadly her understated personality (and difficulty memorizing lines) inevitably kept her from going too far. I would like to have seen more of her punk/genderfuck style. But her personality was such a deadweight anytime she had to speak on screen, that it was only a matter of time before she was sent home.

Madame LaQueer

I can't really think of much to say about Madame LaQueer except that in the wrestling challenge, she looked like Henrietta Bazooms from "Showgirls". LaQueer was sweet and fun to watch, but didn't shine in any particular way... Except in neon green...

Kenya Michaels

Already looking like a teenage girl when she was out of drag, Lil' Kenya Michaels appeared to be "the one to beat". She had a fierce runway strut and enough energy to light up WeHo. Though, as a suggestion from this Poptagonist, if your English is so bad, maybe think twice about going into American television. Nohting against people whose first language isn't English, but if you are going to be on TV and compete to be "America's next drag superstar", it puts you at quite a disadvantage if you are struggling with language. She was sent home in the "Snatch Game" challenge, where her Beyonce "impersonation" was beyond confounding. Still, I liked Kenya's energy and stage presence, and was sad to see her go. I could not believe she was out lip synched by Milan, and would have rather seen more of Kenya than Milan, at that point. Luckily my girl Michelle Visage must have agreed with me becuase when RuPaul let the judges bring an eliminated contestant back, Kenya was back in the game.... But not for long. By the time she was eliminated a second time, I was ready to see this fishy queen go out to sea.

Milan

Actor, dancer, director, chroeographer, producer, is there anything this queen doesn't claim to do? I really was ready to love Milan, she seemed weird and different, but still kind and poised. But she was pretty controlling in any group challenges and never showed any depth. It always seemed like she was "on", like she was hiding some terrible secret. Everything she said felt calculated in some weird way. Similar to when you see politicians speak, and everything they say just oozes with bullshit. By the time she lip synched for the third time in a row, and tore off her wig a second time, I was long ready to see her go. Though, she is the only contestant to, as Willam put it "Swiffer the mainstage with her taint".

Jiggly Caliente

I'm pretty sure Jiggly Caliente was one of the contestants they mostly kept around for drama. She was always crying on "Untucked" and usually looked like a girl who couldn't quite get her shit together in time for homecoming, so wore her big sister's outdated dress. Her lip synch was okay, but just about everything else felt too desperate and sad to really enjoy.

Willam

At first I really hated Willam. Lack of drag name aside, she is an actress, not a "drag performer" in clubs and bars. She always talked about how she had been on soooo many TV shows and how she was soooo pretty, it just got tired and reeked of Los Angeles-type ego. Instead of using drag makeup she used expensive, fancy makeup, which is made for ladies, not lady-boys. You can tell because Willam's BEARD was always showing! I'm convinced that the reason she has been so sucessful in TV and film is because her body is very feminine, but the face and jawline are very tranny. She is a safe choice to play a tranny for popular audiences because for a second she makes you think it's a woman, but then you see the obvious flaws, and you laugh at yourself for ever thinking it was a real woman. Initially, her cockiness was a real turn off for me, but eventually I got used to it and came to appreciate her sarcastic, dry humor. The real turning point for me was when she released a music video about Chick-Fil-A, a notoriously gay-hating fast food chain. Though it has nothing to do with Drag Race, the song is hilarious, and she gives a killer performance in it. By the time she was kicked off the show for breaking the rules (apparently she was on the recieving end of conjugal visits from her man), I was sad to see the show loose her arrogant, but mostly inoffensive humor. Definitely excited to see more of her on the upcoming season of RuPaul's Drag U!

Dida Ritz
In the first episode, Dida announces to the girls in the (You Betta') Work-Room, "I love you all, you are all my sisters, let's just get along." Continuing in an interview to say that she sees no reason to start throwing shade on the first day, and wants to start off on the right foot with all the girls. I appreciated this sentiment. I realize that I am in the vast minority when I say that I like seeing the queens get along, and develop bonds. This was something I really loved about the first season of Drag Race, that all but a few of the queens really came to respect each other. Since season 1, there's been a lot more tension and emotional rifts between the contestants... Until season 4! The season isn't without its drama queens, but the majority of them come to appreciate each other as performers and as people. Dida is never anything less than sweet and kind, which makes me really want to like her.... But her looks are rarely put together well. Her wigs are almost always ratty, as judge Billy B put it "It looks like it was sucked on by a litter of kittens before she put it on." And while she claims her inspiration for looks was Carrie Bradshaw, one judge makes the assesment "She was going for 'Sex in the City' but it was more like 'Sex in the Alley'." I wanted her to look good because she was so sweet, but she didn't have a good handle on proportions of a drag queens, too much shoulder, not enough hair, lots of leg, no hips. Sweet girl, but has to learn a thing or two about drag.

Latrice Royale
La-TRICE ROY-ale! During the run of the season, I went to see Latrice perform at a club in The Castro. The stage was risen, so it was pretty close to the ceiling, which was covered in helium-filled balloons. When Latrice took to the stage, she barely cleared the layer of balloons, and when she spun around during a number, the balloons swirled around her and into the audience like a colorful tornado that you desperately want to be caught in! This is the magic that I think of when I think of Latrice Royale. On Drag Race you can see that they make an effort to include people of different sizes and looks. And the drag community has always seen big girls as less of a stigma than the straight community sees big people. However, on the past seasons of Drag Race, the big queens they've had as contestants were largely a wreck. They don't know how to wear clothes and put together outfits that flatter their curves. La-TRICE ROY-ale, however, is leaps and bounds ahead of all other big girls on the show. She only had a few really stand out looks, but she consistently looked put-together and her body was well flattered. Her drag was more traditional than many other girls, there wasn't much avant-garde, but she more than made up for it with a magnetic personality that would make anybody want to be her friend. She is kind, intelligent, compassionate, honest, gentle and strong, kind of like if Baloo the Bear if he was a drag queen. She quickly became my pick for runner-up this season, and was a shoe-in for Miss Congeneality.

For the past 3 seasons, RuPaul has one final challenge for the top three contestants, then picks the top two and has them do one final lip synch before picking her Queen. This year, the race was so heated and had three such different performers that RuPaul decided to "break all the rules!" Instead of picking a top two, they had a 3-Way Lip Synch, unheard of in Drag Race Herstory! Also, a first for Drag Race Herstory was RuPaul's decision to not announce the winner until the Reunion Special. The Renion Special was filmed in front of a live audience (another first in D.R. Herstory), and even then, THREE different endings were filmed. That means that the top 3 didn't even know who won until it was announced on TV! So, let's take a look at these highly contested queens!


From left: Chad Michaels, Sharon Needles, Phi Phi O'Hara

Phi Phi O'Hara
Throughout the season, I inexplicably kept wanting to like Phi Phi O'Hara. And throughout the season, she gave me no reasons to like her. At best she had a couple cool looks (her Tina Turner-esque postapocalyptic look was cool), but she was mostly a very typical queen who always made herself look older, and tacky on top of it. There are several instances in which she backhandedly tries to sabotage other queens, even queens who she had made close friends with. But even that wasn't as bad as her attitude. She never seems to have any fun! I tried to think of a time when she smiles on the show, and I can't even picture what she looks like smiling (maybe it's like Wednesday Addams in "Addams Family Values"). She kind of has a frenemy relationship with Sharon Needles, and even though Sharon keeps trying to make amends and get along, Phi Phi just can't lose her permanent stink-face. And that was before she refers to the black contestants as "The help"... It was part of a schtick she was doing, but it wasn't funny or done tastefully, and just felt offensive. Bottom line, too much ego, too much hair, too much makeup, too many sequins, too much desperation, not enough personality.

Chad Michaels
Chad Michaels is a seasoned professional of the drag community. She has made her living as a celebrity impersonator, and is so believable that I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if it turned out that Cher was actually Chad in drag all along. Upon first seeing her, I thought she had too much of a Cher look. Which is fine as a performer, but I want to see America's Next Drag Superstar be more versatile. Challenge after challenge, Chad consistently proved that I had underestimated her! Her looks were hugely varied, and she could ease in and out of various looks with impressive skill. The one thing the judges knocked her on was that she was too flawless, there was no vulnerability. Which may be true from the perspective of the judges, only seeing her on the mainstage where her professionalism shines. But the audience definitely came to see Chad as a deeply sympathetic and genuine person. She is always kind and honest, someone who, even though the TV screen, you feel you could sit down with and talk about anything. I would have been happy if Chad had won because she is classy, sharp, alway on point and edgy enough to not be pigeonholed as a showgirl. But I think that ultimately her profession of being an impersonator held her back because, as Sharon once said, Chad's true personality is too genuine and kind to really shine on TV. Even though she didn't win, she has definitely made her mark!

Sharon Needles

Before the season airs, you can watch short intros for each of the the contestants. When I first saw those 3 minutes of Sharon, totally goth'd out and she said "Season four will most definitely be cancelled!" I knew she was my Queen! I saw humor, a dark side, and a strong sense of character in her performance. The first episode was a post-apocalyptic challenge and Sharon sucked her competators dry with a Nosferatu-inspired Zombie/Vampire look, complete with fake blood gushing out of her mouth (see below).

At that moment, with my jaw on the floor and my white-knuckled hands gripping my chair, there was no turning back. Sharon had won over my black heart. In past seasons, queens with more of a genre/schtick haven't made it too far (Tammie Brown, Mimi Imfurst), but Sharon showed the judges that she was anything but a one trick pony. Girly fishiness, executive realness, avant-garde high fashion, Sharon could do it all! And on top of it, her personality was kind, intelligent and funny. I was elated to see how well the judges responded to her versatility and eccentric personality and looks. During the season, she won four challenges, more than any contestant in the history of the show. By the time the top three were picked, the choice seemed obvious, and I had decided that Sharon was my favorite contestant to ever crawl down RuPaul's runway! Sharon had the spunk, humor and look to carry on the legacy of RuPaul, but her edginess was the one thing that could have held her back. In the past Ru has usually chosen the pretty one over the edgy one, Bebe over Nina, Tyra over Raven. Before announcing the winner, RuPaul asked the fans to put their two cents in and tell her who they were rooting for via Facebook and Twitter. The response was overwhelmingly obvious, and while Chad was a close second (and Phi Phi a distant third), it was clear that America had made its choice! Sharon is everything an audience could want in a pop culture icon, she is recognizable, edgy, artistic, yet still humble and intelligent.

I can't even put into words how happy I am that she won. If you've seen it, I needn't explain myself because it is obvious she is beyond incredible. If you haven't seen it, get an after-life and check out this Mistress of the Drag!

Television and movies say the darndest things

I want a t-shirt with this image of Raven, and "No more mom jeans!" a-la Shepard Fairey's "Obama Hope" sign.

I don't think the writers of "Avatar: The Last Airbender" realized how true this is.

That's my favorite way of describing a dinosaur tooth...

I want to hang out with Paleontologists.

"Sister Wives" logic.

I recently watched "Leprechaun: In The Hood" for the first time... To say that it "blew my mind" would be the understatement of the century! It had from death-by-afropic to drag queens to inspiring rappers to racist comments so shocking that I can't believe an all black cast made the film. All that, AND not a single woman is killed. I can't think of a single other horror film that doesn't kill any women. Expect a more detailed blog. In the meantime, be appeased by these two gems of screenshots which depict the heroes dressing in drag as a last ditch effort to defeat the Leprechaun (don't ask, just watch). I couldn't pick which one I liked better, so I put both on.

That's what she said... Or something.

That's what... he said?

2011 Movies: Ranked

Not that I have any respect for the Academy Awards anymore, but the eve of Hollywood's most masturbatory celebration is a good time to reflect on the films of yesteryear.

Travel back with me to a simpler time, a time before the American public was exposed to the atrocity that is Madonna's Cartwheeling Cooter M.I.A.'s middle finger.

The Good

Should be seen, unless you have a particular aversion to the film or genre.

Hanna

Thoroughly exciting, original, and stylized. It is a film that is so engaging from start to finish that a review of it would read like 8 year old me listing the reasons I loved dinosaurs. See it for yourself. Be utterly entertained for two hours.

The Artist

I really love silent films. As a genre of storytelling it is so different from "talkies", and there is a visual language to it that can be stylized and exciting, even without words. It was it's own form of narration that was just abandoned, and the closest we get to it now are awkward and don't properly capture the genre (Guy Maddin comes to mind). "The Artist" however, knows how to use the advantages of the genre. Hyper-real performances (I want Missi Pyle to have her own sequel!), stylized lighting and camerawork all contribute to making this film feel more like a genuine silent film. In other words, I have been wanting to see this done well for a long while. It could be seen as another romantic comedy, and I hate romantic comedies. But in this film, the romance is more of a lengthy flirtation. It takes backseat to the journey of the characters, and the film industry itself. And ultimately, the film is about a female star who uses her power to help a man who must swallow his pride and accept it. It's not terribly complex, but it doesn't have to be, it is done well, and has good performances.

Drive

It would be easy to say this movie is all about Ryan Gosling showing just how good and subtle of a performance he can give. And that would all be true, and enough reason to watch this film. But the movie is well made, and manages to effortlessly blend different genres together around a basic, but well developed plot. The result is just-artsy-enough and just-romantic-enough and just-violent-enough and just-mobsterish-enough to appease almost anybody... If you can stomach people getting their brains blown out... But it only happens a couple times! I wish I could say that I am surprised that this film, and Gosling, were almost completely snubbed at the Oscars... But it's never surprising when the Oscars ignore good, and bold filmmaking.

X-Men First Class

I already reviewed this one here. Basically, it's the X-Men movie this fanboy been waiting to see! That being said, it is pretty sad that any superhero movie is this high on my list of the best movies of the year. I love superheroes, but I'm not about to kid myself and say that superhero films are fine art... Well... Most aren't. This one was awesome, but it is sad that there weren't more better films this year.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2

Also, already reviewed this here.. A throroughly enjoyable and climactic ending.

Attack the Block

A great addition to the "Alien Invasion" genre of movies. On top of it being well made, and exciting throughout the film, it has a genuine message about alienation, poverty and violence. Its one of those movies could very well have been made by starting with the message, and then deciding to use the backdrop of an invasion to tell the story.

Bridesmaids

Good, smart, wacky comedies, a rare combination to find. Good, smart, wacky comedies starring an almost exclusively female cast, a practically impossible combination to find! Congrats to Melissa McCarthy for her Oscar Nomination for this performance!

The Watchable

Films worth seeing if you have a particular interest in it, but nothing revolutionary or ground breaking here.

Hugo

Though not without it's problems, Hugo is beautifully made. It has sequences depicting some of the most fantastic silent film productions, which are all particularly appealing to me. Especially because the films emphasizes the role of the filmmaker as an artist, and shows the dedication and love that can go into one's work. The way it deals with the connection of an artist to their work really touched me and even made me cry at one point! However, this touching story about a lost artist re-discovering his muse plays second fiddle to a mediocre performance and trite story about a lost orphan boy who "learns the true meaning of family". "Hugo" has one of those plots that are fueled by tension between characters that would be easily relieved had the characters simply spoken to one another instead of being angsty freazoids! It is leading the Oscar race with the most nominations, including Best Picture. Wouldn't have been my first choice, but it is far superior to many Best Picture nominees (and winners) in past years.

Immortals

I reviewed this film in a previous post, see it here. It's well made, and worth seeing if you have an interest in these ancient greek movies. Definitely the best of the new wave of sword and sandal movies.

Weekend

I'm not usually a fan of romance movies (gay or straight), but I heard this one was good, so I checked it out. It is a well made indie romance, though plot-wise it is comparable to almost any other romance. What stood out to me about this one is the perspective and experiences two main characters have had being gay. The main character is solitary, unsocial, and "out" to his close friends (none of whom are gay), but generally not open about things like sex. He always feels on the outside, and while he may be secure in his sexuality, he is insecure of himself on some level. Romance aside, it is a story that I believe, many people could relate to.

Captain America

At this point, I pretty much know what to expect from superhero movies. Captain America isn't spectacular or groundbreaking, though it does manage to pull of a Nazi-Fighting Montage in a way that is both exciting, fun and not too cheesy. Well, cheesy in a way that works for the 1940's feel of it. I also was surprised by how impressed I was with Chris Evans. To play Pre-Cap Steve Rogers, they digitally put Chris Evans' face onto a smaller man's body, a slippery slope indeed. Still, it didn't look as bad as I thought it might, and Evans does a good job depicting the scrappy but courageous Soldier-Wannabe. Then, once Rogers becomes Captain America and grows the pecs and arms he was always meant to have, Evans still keeps that tone of innocence as the unassuming, but powerful Captain America. It was his endearing performance that made this film stand above others like Thor and Iron Man 2. Plus, Hugo Weaving as Red Skull?! YES!

Super 8

Aside from the gratiuitous amount of lens flare and trite Spielberg-isms that are thrown it, "Super 8" is mostly enjoyable. Doesn't always make a lot of sense, but it is simple enough that there isn't much that would ruin the plot. And, what stands out the most, is the group of kids featured in the film. It's hard to have a group of child actors get together and behave like normal adolescents would. There is a fine line of friends tormenting and playing that can come across as forced if pushed too far. But each of the kids is unique, and important, and their interactions all feel very real.

Rango

Cute family film. I mostly watched it because of the animation, which really was amazing. Beyond the animation, there was nothing great about the movie, but nothing overly stupid. It is a good kids movie, and perhaps Johnny Depps best performance in years. Mostly because you can't tell it's Johnny Depp. Not to say that I hate Johnny Depp, I'm just tired of seeing him play a rehashed Jack Sparrow or morose Tim Burton protagonist. It was nice to be reminded of how verastile he can be.

The Future

Huh......... It's weird and I like that... Still... Huh...

Paranormal Activity 3

I get all of the Paranormal Activity movies mixed up in my head. If you like the genre of found footage horror, then you'll probably like it. I also do have to give the series creds for following along the same story for 3 movies!

Thor

Norse Bro is kicked out of Bro-ville. He spend some time bro-ing out on earth before he gets help from some of his other Norse Bros so he can go back and Bro-out in Bro-ville. There are some cool effects and everything else you would expect, some cool fights, a few laughs. If you like superhero movies, it is enjoyable but nothing new. It also has Natalie Portman, who I think is like Bruce Willis in that they make one good films every three or four years and then they suck in everything else. We tapped out our good Porman with "Black Swan" so expect her to be annoying again for the next few years.

The Unwatchable

Movies that I found to be completely not worth seeing.

Super

This film isn't necessarily "unwatchable", it has funny parts and some decent performances in it. I usually enjoy films that look at complicated and real violence (as opposed to simplistic cartoon violence, which is how I see most superhero violence) in an interesting or unique way. The problem I had with this film is that it deals with very graphic violence in such a casual way. This isn't some zombie flick where people are getting torn up left and right, this is a real man, who has a textbook case of schizo-something, committing real acts of violence. People around him die, he never stops to see himself for what he is.... And then he's rewarded in the end. It has one of the most unbalanced moral compasses this side of Zack Snyder  I understand that this film has appeal for some people, but I see it as a film that is damaging to a society already obsessed with violence.

Scream 4

I feel like I grew up constant anticipation of which teen actress from 90's WB was going to get gutted by GhostFace next. And going into this one, I didn't want to believe it would be good, but I still thought "Well, it's gotta be better than the third one, right?" ... I was wrong.

The Beaver

This movie ties with "Sucker Punch" as my most hated of the year, mostly because it is completely devoid of creativity. Other than the ploy of the beaver puppet, this movie has nothing remotely original or interesting about it. It is basically "Mrs. Doubtfire" meets "Elizabethtown", but with a puppet.

Sucker Punch

I watched this movie knowing that I loathe Zack Snyder. But I thought it would be funny, and the stylization and action would keep me entertained. I was wrong. This movie has a plot that is more simplistic than most video games, and more plot holes than the entire series of "Lost". And the worst part is that the film thinks that if you give a hot woman a fantasy world, a sexy outfit and a weapon, the juxtaposition of the sexy and dangerous automatically create a feminist icon. Though meanwile in the real world, the women are utterly complacent, putting up barely any resistance against the oppressive men abusing them. This is supposed to be okay because the girls are actually totally badass fighters... Except not really. Only in the imaginary world do they ever stand up for themselves.

(SPOILER: all but one of them gets killed or otherwise permanently penetrated by a man)

Even in part of the "Fantasy" they are all prostitutes in a burlesque house run by their pimp (who is actually an orderly that can somehow get away with murdering mental patients). There is literally a scene in which the lead character "Baby Doll" is standing right next to her step-father and an orderly as they devise a plot to illegaly lobotomize her. Does Baby Doll a) speak up for herself b) make a run for it c) inform the authorities of the plot or d) none of the above, and instead looks at all the pretty girls? Well, Snyder likes pretty girls, so of course his lead stares at pretty girls, even as her fate is being decided by two crooked men. It's basically saying "forget all this lobotomy talk, there's hot chicks to gawk at!" Snyder consistently has the most obvious, trite choice of music. He often chooses good songs, but places them in a context that is so tasteless and devoid of depth that the songs are ruined! To top it all off, the theatrical release of "Sucker Punch" is actually not even a finished version of the awful film that was made... There is more visual vomit to puke on top of this heaping pile of bile. The film has three layers of reality, the "real" world, in which the girls are patients in an asylum, the bordello reality in which they are slave-sex-workers from which the girls leap into their next video game level. In the bordello reality, they are supposed to be burlesque dancers, and they are constantly talking about dancing, and at dance practice... But there's no actual dancing!!! Snyder uses the dance sequences as a springboard from which the girls leap into battle mode. We constantly see them JUST ABOUT to dance, or JUST FINISHED dancing, but there is NO actual dancing... And it comes across as incredibly awkward. Until the end credits, which are a montage of burlesque sequences that were meant to be in the film, and instead are just used as extra crazy-sauce on the tail end of this Mysogyny Sunday. There is a directors cut which includes the dance sequences, which was supposed to be an entire aspect of the film that included several musical numbers. Which may make the film feel less disjointed, but no less atrocious.

Pic-centric (4)

These are pics of my good friend and incredibly talented artist, Lauren Day Benson doing a portrait of Lady Gaga with sidewalk chalk!

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 4 runner up, Raven, gave her mother a glam makeover on RuPaul's Drag U. The twist? Her mother is Mormon and had never seen her son in drag! It was just surprising to learn this model of smoldering drag fierceness was raised as a Mormon!

Look out world, Mitsy Poochista has arrived!

OK, also, for real, super serial, gonna tell it like it is and keep it real...

RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE SEASON 4 STARTS NEXT WEEK!

I mostly try to not think about it because when I do, it's like a child anticipating Christmas. Above we have Season 4 contestant Sharon Needles, great name, great face and seems to have a great commitment to the character! Plus, she's super goth, so she's won my heart.

Remember the preacher from Poltergeist II that I said would haunt your nightmares. I wasn't kidding!

The two images above are from "Avatar: The Last Airbender". I recently watched the series, and I thought it was really well made and was surprisingly mature and interesting for a kid's show. It seems to be more popular among people who aren't particularly big fans of anime, so if you are an anime aficionado, it might not be for you. But I really could go on and on about the various reasons I think it's great, and I'm sure one day I will. For today, I will just show a couple of images that are examples of one of my favorite aspects of the show. As I said, I am not a huge fan of anime. Not to say I don't like ANY anime, there are definitely some anime films I love. But, especially in television, the animation can be very intense, and in "Avatar" I really liked that the animation will change slightly to fit the mood of the scene. People are mostly drawn in an anime style, but then, when they meet an Indian monk, he is subtly drawn differently to look more Indian. The show also departs from anime altogether when telling a story of the past. These two images are from different stories, which are shown in Japanese zen style, or with a more simplistic, almost paper-cut-out like style. It shows that the show is willing to depart from its comfort zone and show the viewer something new altogether.

Plus, prettttttty!

Hahaha, a Firefly still. Juuuust suckin' on some strawberry.

 

Oh Netflix, you know me so well!

 

After finishing the 90's X-Men cartoon, I decided to watch a bunch of the different X-Men shows. "X-Men: Evolution" was okay, not great. I like that they have some more obscure New Mutants on the show. But I hate that they make up a random character (Spike) to put on the team. He is boring and has the same powers as an already existing character. I just never understand when they make up a character instead of using the ZOUNDS of already established characters. Plus, both Spike and Nightcrawler (shown above) have these "streetwear" looks in which they are sagging their pants, and have their shirts tucked into their underwear.

Was that EVER a look?!?

 

"Wolverine and the X-Men" came after "Evolution" and despite my initial distaste for making Wolverine the leader just for the sake of popularity, the show is really good! It's the only series that features Emma Frost (above) as a member of the X-Men The series is about Wolverine trying to get the disbanded X-Men back together after the disappearance of Xavier and Jean leaves the mansion in ruins. Maybe the best X-Men cartoon yet, interesting storyline that actually comes to a great climax. It's the only X-Men cartoon that doesn't have an opening credits intro for each teammate. This is fun because you never know who is going to come back to the team and who doesn't.

SPOILERS:

Emma sacrifices herself in order to have the most fabulous death of all time! Exploding into millions of tiny diamonds that rain down on the other characters! Below is Cyclops, looking at the shards of his could-have-been lover!

Winter 2011 Pop Roundup

Okay, I know it's kinda late, but I decided to do a little recap of a few things I was watching at the end of 2011

 Immortals

This is director Tarsem Singh's newest film, his first since "The Fall". When I first heard the words "Tarsem" and "Greek mythology" together, I was excited. Then I saw the preview, and it just looked like a rehashed "300" (a film I loathe almost as much as "Lady in the Water"). I was worried that Tarsem's walking-fashion-shoot style would fall flat on its face. The new wave of sword and sandal movies have proven to follow suit with other contemporary action movies, a hollow visual style, overly complex plot, hot women, and hotter muscle dudes, overall, they leave a lot to be desired. Nevertheless, I felt my eyes begging me to let them feast on whatever Tarsem has to offer. Of course my eye balls were blown away, and my brain was actually pleasantly surprised as well. Tarsem reigns in his intense visual style to convey the difference between the world of men and the world of the Gods, the world of men is dirty and old, saving pure opulence for the Gods. The story is simplistic, not overly complicated, and with the combination of classic storytelling and eye gouging visuals, I can only imagine that this film truly displays the imaginative grandeur of Hellenistic Greece in a way that ancient Greeks would understand. While its characters are archetypal, they do not feel forced, or contrived. Mickey Rourke is especially enthralling as the tyrant King Hyperion, a psychopath who makes sense in the most twisted way. It also has a stronger and more varied feminine presence than most films of its type. Women in this world are warriors, priestesses, mothers, they are shown as both emotionally and physically powerful, though different from men. Of course, it is, fundamentally, an action movie. And it certainly pays off with jaw dropping battle scenes. These are not battles of full armies clashing with swords flying. Tarsem focuses on a more singular style of fighting, focusing on the individual battles that are shaping the future of this world. Yes, men fight men, and Mickey Rourke's final battle really displays his acting chops. But what is really astounding to watch is the battles of the Gods and Titans! It is like The Matrix meets Mortal Kombat (because of the huge amounts of blood), all clad in shiny gold armor. Bottom line, this is the movie about ancient Greece I have been waiting to see.

Melancholia

Lars Von Trier's latest cinematic shock therapy is perhaps his least misogynistic, but also not as well realized of a story as many of its predecessors. I can appreciate the emotional pain he invokes in the audience, but in the case of "Melancholia", the pain was not worth it! The film is split into two parts for the two sisters whom the film focuses on. The first part is about Justine at her lavish wedding party. She is pretty, wealthy, newly wed to a completely doting husband, and yet she is cripplingly depressed. We spend the first half of the film watching her being showered with attention and wealth, yet she is seething with depression. After about twenty minutes of this, I was desperately wondering what about this story are we supposed to be drawn to? By the end, you can see that Von Trier is satirizing the wealthy, showing us that ultimately wealth does not separate you from the existentialism of human condition. But the entire first hour does not give you enough perspective to see this. The film moves on to the second part of the story, focusing on Justine's highly practical sister, Claire. We discover that the world is watching a stray planet (named Melancholica) which may or may not crash into earth. And though this sci-fi element intrigued me, by the time it is revealed, I was tired of watching depressed rich people, and I just wanted the planet to crash into earth already.

Terra Nova

The basic premise for this show is that 150 years in the future, mankind is totally screwed. At mankind's daaaaaarkest hour, a time slip is found that goes back to dinosaur times, so the government (or whoever it is that runs America) decides to send colonists back in time in one final effort to save mankind. Can you guess the name of the colony? Terra Nova. Obviously. The planet is dying, the air is barely breathable, and social disparity is at it's worst.  One of the new laws is that a family can only have two kids. Enter the Shannon family, who have THREE kids of course their third, is the special little illegal jewel of a precious girl... Obviously. The feds bust them and arrest the father. While the father (Jim, which always sounds like a fake name to me, because of David's use of the name as an alias with a hookup on "Six Feet Under") is in jail, the mother is asked to go to Terra Nova because of her mad doctor skillz (in the world of Terra Nova, "Doctor" means you can do everything, from electronics, to computer hacking, to biochemistry, it's all the same... Obviously.) But, the mother cannot bring their illegal child, so she breaks the husband out of jail, and smuggle him and the girl into Terra Nova. Once there, the Main Bro of Terra Nova decides to make Jim his Number One Bro (despite the fact that he is a fugitive), and the rest of the series pretty much unfolds as an epic Bro-Down with dinosaurs. There are a few women Bro-ing down too, you can spot the Women-Bros (Wo-Bros) because they all seem to have a huge surplus of liquid eye-liner. The show is utterly mediocre, and the entire season I kept waiting for them to explain why the Shannon family felt like they should be privileged enough to have extra children. The show seems to be all about family values (about half of the episodes end with the family cooing over children, babies or family in some way), but the leads are people who deliberately are breaking laws that are designed to create a better life for ALL families. I just think it's a terrible message to say "Have more kids, even when it's illegal. It's okay if we reeeeally want them, those other people should follow the rules, but we don't have to", when we ARE overpopulated, and ARE facing the dilemmas proposed in the show. The show is pretty much summed up by a line delivered by Commander Taylor (the Head Bro), when he is holding up a newborn baby, "This is what Terra Nova is all about". So, when it comes to Terra Nova (or as I like to call it, Terra-Brova), "Expect the expected".

American Horror Story

There are a few problems I have with the show. First being the main characters are pretty bland. But perhaps the most distasteful element I can give away without any spoilers is the way it handles the home's previous owners, a gay couple. It has utterly unfunny and tasteless jokes that a 13 year old would find funny, like the ol' "Those homos- I mean homeowners", yes someone really said that and quickly followed up with a "Queer eye for the straight guy" joke. One of the more interesting elements of the show is the slow reveal of decades worth previous  residents of the home. It usually involves creepy people, doing creepy things... Unless the residents are gay. Then it obviously involves working out, a Martha Steward-esque level of crafting and squealing about "twinks". It just fumes me that the creators of this show (the creators of "Glee," which may be why they love stereotyping gay people) are the people in Hollywood that America sees as progressive in terms of gay characters in the media. There were more progressive gay characters on TV ten years ago (makes me appreciate David on "Six Feet Under")!

Project Accessory

The latest spin-off of Project Runway is the same style of competition show, but with accessory designers instead of fashion designers. It's interesting because the work that goes into making shoes and bags and jewelry is very different from clothes. The problem is, watching a necklace and clutch purse coming down the runway is significantly less exciting than seeing unique and interesting clothing design. However, as a result, the judges really do appreciate the outrageous designs over demure, classy ones. And I'll take outrageous and interesting over boring and chic any day! The hosts and judges are mostly duds. Instead of Heidi Klum they have Molly Sims, who is so vacant, she makes the Stepford Wives look human. They've replaced Tim Gunn with Eva Jeanbart-Lorenzotti who is devoid of any kind of attachment or interest in anything... Which is actually pretty hilarious to watch. She comes across as a drunk pill popper who will smile and deliver lines, but really just doesn't want to hear about another clutch purse and can't wait to get back to her bloody mary backstage.

Project Runway All-Stars

Regarding Project Runway All-Stars.... Are these really the All-Stars? When I think All-Stars, I think of contestants who made it to the top 3, or final 4. The cast is full of people who were eliminated at the beginning, middle and end of their seasons. Because we've seen all these designers before, it almost seems too easy to predict who will make it to the top and who is just cannon fodder. Nevertheless, I'm excited and rooting for Jarell!!!!!

Actually... Firefly kinda sucks. Yes, even Mal.

You would be hard pressed to find a bigger Buffy fan than me. I love Buffy, I love Angel, I like Joss Whedon and despite how every other Whedon fan in the 'verse feels, I really hate Firefly.

No, Slayerettes, it's not bullshit, it's true!

The movie that followed the quickly-cancelled TV show was adequate, but still suffers from many of the same problems as the show. "Firefly" takes place centuries in the future, when mankind has left earth in order to "terraform" other planets, making them habitable to humans. There is an oppressive "Alliance" which fought its way to power by crushing the opposing "Independents". The Alliance operates mostly in the richer, more central planets, leaving the outer planets as a kind of "Wild Frontier" where lawlessness and corruption flourishes.

There is an ongoing storyline exploring what the Alliance is, and the lengths that they will go to in order to control people. This is mostly explored through River and Simon Tam, a brother and sister who are both wealthy and highly intelligent. River, a super-mega-genius chose to attend an Alliance run institution, where they held her captive and performed experiments that traumatized her almost beyond repair. As it unfolds, River's story is harrowing, and Summer Glau does a great job depicting the traumatized teenager. I appreciate that the story was told, I like the emphasis on indaviduality over conformism that is

That is about where the good parts of the show end. The overall story and its intentions are compelling and original enough, emphasizing indaviduality over conformism. Other than a few decent episodes, and some good fight scenes in the film, the rest of the story just feels haphazardly thrown together.

The series focuses on Captain Malcom Reynolds, who makes his living shipping cargo across the 'verse. Many of his jobs are illegal (though not all), and as a veteran Independent, he enjoys running under the Alliance's nose. The crew on his ship are a band of inexplicably loveable rogues. There is the mechanic, who is cute and bubbly, the pilot who is wacky and lighthearted, the hired muscle who is dumb and boar-headed, the preacher who is wise and mysterious. The list goes on with occupations randomly paired with quirks that make little or no contextual sense or is just the most simple rendition of a person you could imagine (See: Zoe, Action Figure). These people are outlaws, they are from backwater planets, they frequently visit lawless planets where ruthlessness is the best way to survive. And yet, with one exception (the decidedly dumb guy), the crew is friendly, kind and compassionate. It just makes me think of how a spaceship crew would be depicted in a Disney cartoon. People who would be surly, disagreeable, and selfish in the real world are instead, cute and friendly, each with their individual quirk. Most of these characters are too simplistic and transparent to be taken as seriously on a show intended for adults.

Like I said above, I like Joss Whedon. I like that he has a strong voice in his writing (though I also understand that it can get irritating and alienating for non-fans). However, the quick-witted retorts and roundabout sentence structure that defined Whedon in Buffy, simply doesn't hold up when he's dealing with a group of rough-n'-ready bandits. It's just another way that the show is nonsensically cute.

The main problem with this quirky crew of bandits is that it feels like Joss Whedon made a list of jobs on the ship, and a list of character traits, threw them all into separate hats and just drew the adjectives out to make characters. Malcom and River are the only two characters who really break out of these designated and blunt characteristics. And two out of a cast of nine is not enough to make me care about their weekly antics. While the overall story about the Alliance is interesting, taken episode by episode, we just watch these merry bandits pulling one job or another. And the crew just comes across as such fabricated characters, it makes for a dull show. Had the series been about different characters in the same universe, it could have been more dynamic. I could really go on and on about the problems with Wash, Kaylie, Jane, Zoe, Shepard Book and Inara... But I will focus on Wash...

Wash and Zoe are both little more than half a character, put together in the hopes that we will find ourselves attached to this mismatched couple. Instead, they are awkward, and we are never given any reason why they are in love, we are just expected to accept it. The two have zero chemistry, and Wash is an annoying unfunny rip off of Xander from Buffy. I like that he has one of the strongest moral compasses in the group. But that only comes up when they are having group discussions about questionable morals, like a little light goes on, and suddenly Wash has to be indignant for a few minutes, before Mal making whatever decision he wants anyway. Whenever I bring up my distaste for Wash, fans bring up the episode "War Stories" in which his jealousy of the captain takes center stage. The episode is okay, I appreciate that they're developing the character. But the thing that sticks out in my mind is Wash, blindfolded, screaming and sticking his neck out like a dinosaur. Not even looking in the direction of the person he is speaking to, just shaking his head around like his blindfold is actually some virtual tennis match. Just.... bad acting.... And as for Zoe... Her character amounts to being a badass, and having a husband. And she carries a gun. She is basically a walking action figure with even less personality than her annoying husband.

Shepard Book and Inara are two characters who are just shallow. Book seems to have superglued his fingers together sometime before the series starts, and never has managed to separate them. His role is to deliver spiritually enigmatic, but still comforting words of wisdom while never separating his fingertips. Inara is a "Companion" who comes across like she is addicted to painkillers, rather than the spiritual Geisha she is supposed to be. The series really tries to integrate this spiritual element to it by including these characters, but (like so much about the show), it just ends up being shallow. We don't really see them pray or practice, beyond the Sheppard occasionally saying things like "The Lord has a path for all his children" or "The Lord has given me a flock to look after." If one is going to make spirituality such a strong theme in a series, there should be some thought put into it beyond how the characters look and behave... Something like... Oh, i dunno, what they believe?!

 

Finally there is Malcom Reynolds. Heralded as the ultimate "Beloved Rogue" character, he is mostly enjoyable to watch if not consistent. One minute he's badass to the bone, the next he's getting into petty arguments or exchanging quick witted dialogue with his scrappy crew. He seems to have a book of maybe 7 or 8 ways of behaving and switches between them all depending on who he's talking to. Which somewhat makes sense for the character, he's charming, knows how to sweet talk his way out of many a situation. Maybe it's because I don't have a vagina (since Nathan Fillion seems to have a direct line to women's lust), but I just don't particularly love him. I don't dislike him as much as most of the other characters, but he's not enough to hold the series together.

Similarly to how the characters are simple pairings of jobs and character traits, most elements of the show resonate with the same forced mix-and-match style. The most obvious one is the cowboy/space travel metaphor. The concept of space being the "final frontier" has been dealt with ever since science fiction entered the public mind. But the frontier part is taken far too literally in this series. They go so far as to have cities on outer planets that could be leftover sets from Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. And I understand that these planets are poor and struggling for life, but there is too much throwback to cowboy times. For example, people ride horses. And I refuse to believe a horse (or multiple horses), which needs lodging, food and medical care, is more cost-efficient than whatever basic vehicles the future has to offer. They even have 19th century fashion, complete with women wearing bonnets. Seriously. Amish-style bonnets. I believe some aspects of historical fashion is completely viable as a futuristic throwback, like the duster Malcom wears. But bonnets will never come back into fashion. And everything is made of wood. Even the dinner table on the spaceship! Now, I'm no scientist, but if mankind fucked up earth SO bad that we had to leave and conform other planets to be like ours, I would guess that trees and wood would be an expensive commodity. All cheap things would be made of plastic, not this resource that has to be specially grown on an alien planet.

The other big theme of the show that resembles the slap-dash creating is the appropriation of Chinese culture. Throughout the series, there is a convergence of American and Chinese culture. Because America and China are the current world superpowers, the idea is they were the two countries to colonize other planets, thus bringing their cultures to merge together in outer space. And that logic holds up, as the series features Chinese language, writing, culture, except it's missing one critical thing.... THERE'S NOT A SINGLE ASIAN CHARACTER ON THE SHOW!!!! I spotted one bandit character who might be half Chinese, and one scene has some men demonstrating samurai swords in the background (which are Japanese). For a series that decided to use Chinese language and culture so much, it is just piss-poor planning to have NO Chinese people on the show. And the Chinese curses are only used when either nothing at all has to be said, or when the thing being said is so obvious that they could have said it in gibberish. It's a decision that has logic behind it, but it is used illogically to play up the theme. Like the cowboy/space thing, it's a conceptual metaphor that's solid, but used in excessive ways that feel forced.

The overall story about the Alliance and their efforts to control society are interesting, and I believe it's a story worth telling. River's story is the most intertwined with the Alliance, and it is a well put together arc. Had this world been explored without the crew of Serenity, it could have been a stronger series. Firefly features characters like Saffron, an identity-changing, planet-hopping thief with a talent for fooling men. And Early, a bounty hunter whose character has an intensity that is paired with an aloofness, all wrapped up in a sadistic bow, making him one of the most interesting cameo characters I've ever seen on T.V. If the show had focused on some of these people who are more hardened by the life they live, it would have felt more realistic.

All in all, I think the series had some good intentions, but got too bogged down in superficialities and styles. Sure, if the series had more time, it could have been better, but there still would have been Wash, and horse-drawn carriages, and bonnets, and Chinese cursing, and cute quips coming from people who have seen the very worst humans have to offer... but who still love a good ol' fashioned family-style dinner with the crew of Serenity. Ultimately, Firefly got what it deserved. The show could not have sustained itself for much longer without having to address some of the glaring plot and conceptual issues it faced. Firefly never needed another season, the story is worth telling (though hard to watch at times), and the film is a rewarding climax to the series. Although, maybe if there was a second season, we would have found out where all the Chinese people have been hiding. And then I could answer my dire question: Do Chinese people in space curse in English?

Proof of Mutants Among Us!

Proof of Mutants among us!!

Here are photos from a school in New York, known to house multiple mutants!

Below are just a few photos, proof of mutant activity! Are they friend or foe?!